Why Businessmen Speak Bull$*@!

That’s a dung beetle pushing a ball of dung. Business people do this job every day! Because business people often peddle dung, it only makes sense that they speak the Language of Dung. Businessmen aren’t the only ones who speak the language of Dung. Politicians are gifted in the language, too. I’m not terribly interested in politics though. I’m much more interested in business. Business and politics both are free flowing when it comes to dung.

The Language of Dung is different than the Language of Expertism. They’re very closely related though. Read a business book by a member of academia and you’ll understand the subtle, but significant difference. The “I’m the expert so you mere mortals can’t possibly grasp the depth of my intellect” is rampant in the business world. Words you’ve never heard or seen are often used by such gurus. I’ve read thousands of business books in my life and I confess that I’d read entire chapters before without understanding the point. That’s Expertism. But Dung is Dung, not Expertism.

Quality questions can put people on the spot. They can clarify, or confuse. They can provide a businessperson the opportunity to speak the truth - or dung.

Dung is the language of ignorance. It’s the “I-don’t-know” answer. It’s the grown up version of the essay question we all remember from our junior high history class. Just drone on and on with the few facts you do know, and couple those with lots of verbiage in hopes the teacher won’t take the time to read it carefully and call, “Bull $#@!” on you.

A job applicant asks the interviewer, “What is your company’s compelling reason? Why should customers choose you over a competitor?”

The answer comes forth. It will either be truth - a very valid compelling reason that makes sense - OR - it will be dung. “Our people make the difference.” My dung-meter is pegged!

A potential investor seeks answers about a company’s poor annual report. He reads the report and the letter written by the CEO. The CEO either takes responsibility and lays out his plans to fix the problems, or he more likely takes up the language of Dung and paints all the problems in rose colored hue.

A customer experiences a problem. They ask for a solution. They’re either told how their problem is going to be addressed, or more likely Dung is spoken and they’re told why their problem can’t be fixed.

Why do businessmen speak bull$*@!?

Pure and simple. Because they don’t have a real answer. So they make something up hoping somebody will believe they’re really telling the truth. Or, they do it to impress. To make people believe they’re highly intellectual.

It’s a ridiculous habit. But wouldn’t we all just fall over dead if we heard the plain spoken truth - all the time?

This man would never survive in the business world. He’s much too forthcoming.